I Frxxen Miss Your Arse

And there's a dude here that looks like you.... Didn't get a pic of him though; no way to get one inconspicuously, so no proof. Whatevs, that doesn't have *any* bearing on whether or not I hate you....you nasty bastard, you.... Anyway, on a heartbreakingly serious note, I don't understand why I feel this way....I don't even love you, per se; obviously my feelings for you were merely born of a physical attraction and emotional compensation for a ton of shit that I have lacked my entire life....hence my tears.... The love I give to my children, my spaniel and my friends are the only types of love I am sure of....I'm utterly shellshocked when it comes to men, my own mother and my father....too many conditions placed on something that ought to be given and received freely. Yes, you do know me, and you know quite well how I like to be kissed and touched....I thought that we shared something more infinite than that. When I shared myself with you, it was honestly and completely. I wish I could take it *all* back; every secret I told you, every kiss, every poem I wrote you .....every fucking thing:/ I hate feeling this way; I'm so angry with you and with myself. Crybaby? Perhaps.... You were a frikken star from heaven, and for a while, I felt lucky and tremendously happy. No guilt trip intended.